The Beloved Self Healing Project is about me and about you.

I launched this site on the first day of 2012 and will embark on this quest for personal wellness, for as long as it takes. My blog focuses on both the personal and professional aspects of my life and how each was impacted and then later transformed by the practices I share here.

Yes, it is my intention to experience transformation. The degree of (or lack of) transformation will be documented on this site.

I hope that you will join me if this project is aligned with you and your own quest to live a more actualized life.

What Got Me Here

Many years ago I experienced some physical challenges. I will not go into the details or give my condition a label, as I believe that is irrelevant. The important thing to know is that I had a profound experience in the process of healing myself. I accomplished this using alternative modalities, but mostly through spiritual practice and deep personal work.

However, I have not succeeded in reaching the healing goal I had hoped for. I still have a variety of symptoms that come and go and overall do not have the vitality that I witness in others.

Before I go further I need to make a request of you, dear reader. You will surely have your heart in the right place and possibly a desire to be helpful, but please do not offer any diagnostic suggestions. This blog will focus exclusively on the practices that have the ability to facilitate healing. That’s what I will talk about and that is what I request you talk about.

While I may mention symptoms as a statement of the context of my experience, it is my intention to avoid dwelling on them. The FOCUS will be on the uplifting practices and not on trying to control or stop the symptoms. I appreciate your support in maintaining this orientation.

I have managed to live a full life and take on the responsibilities of running my own business, even with the discomfort that I often experience. Those who know me personally and professionally will attest that I am extremely reliable and that I keep my commitments. I am conscientious and no matter how I feel physically, it does not interfere with my business performance.

I have learned to live with my discomfort and I manage my life in such a way that my difficulties are not obvious to most people who know me. When my symptoms flare up I do what I need to do to take care of myself. This can mean missing or cutting short a social event or not being able to participate in certain activities or travel experiences.

Over the years I have explored many healing avenues – traditional medicine, alternative modalities, spiritual healing practices, prayer, meditation, emotional healing work, life coaching and counseling.

While I have made much progress in the past few years, at times I have felt great frustration and sorrow. I share this not to complain (though I’ve done my share of that!) but merely to let you know my experience.

It has been a long road. And now I want more. I want to feel better – much better. I want to function at a higher level. I want to give more to the world.

During my quest for healing over a decade ago I got the greatest results from spiritual practices. Just for clarity, I am not talking about anything “religious” that is affiliated with any religious sect. But rather the practices and philosophies that are universal truths, and the purest foundation of many spiritual paths. Practices like acceptance, forgiveness, self-awareness, meditation, connection to a power greater than me.

I believe that I have not been able to manifest full physical comfort because I have not allowed myself to maintain a consistent discipline of the practices that I know can bring me the personal transformation that will spell relief.

I believe that I am fully responsible for my experience of life. And it is my consistent experience that what I focus on increases. When I am in a positive space and focus on other positive aspects, that’s what I get more of. And conversely, when I am in a negative space I tend to attract more negative experiences until I shift my focus to what I want rather than what is actually my current experience. This is the Law of Attraction. You may not “believe” in it. That’s fine and if not you will take issue with my approach. I put “believe” in quotes because while I would often prefer that the Law of Attraction was not operating in my world, my experience is that it is a universal law.

With that said I have to take responsibility for the fact that I still suffer physically. I don’t “blame” myself (okay sometimes I do) but if I am honest with myself I have to admit that I still hold a lot of internal negativity. Not because I want to but because I have not been successful in releasing it. The reason why I haven’t is irrelevant. I just know that I have now made a decision that I can shift away from negativity and that it’s time to do so.

At times I am too hard on myself and think I just need to delve more deeply into my psyche to uncover and resolve childhood hurts. That kind of personal work is extremely important and is certainly tied to self-acceptance. I have explored the psychological areas quite thoroughly in my adult life, and while there might be more, I believe that’s a path that’s been well traveled.

My friend Denise DeSimone recently published a book about her healing process from a life-threatening illness. I had the honor of being her prayer partner during the time of her health challenge. Each morning we would share a prayer for each other. It was a very powerful experience. While we offered each other the healing power of prayer, I believe that the love and support we gave was just as powerful (but then prayer and love are essentially one in the same, aren’t they?).

Denise’s quest for health took her to many places and many levels of awareness. She did not shy away from any avenue of her truly holistic approach. In her book From Stage IV to Center Stage, she shares that the most profound awareness for her, the thing that ultimately healed her, was the practice of self-love.

Almost 30 years ago I first discovered Louise Hay when I read her book You Can Heal Your Life. I’m sure there were others who came before her, but Louise was one of the first well-known healing practitioners who wrote and taught that self-love is the foundation for healing.

I read her book and have used it as a reference for years. I read her affirmations. I therefore felt like I had “been there – done that.”

But my friend Denise’s book was a reminder and an inspiration to get honest about the parts of me that are still rather self-critical and unforgiving.

Forgiveness is an essential element of self love. I will write more about this in my blog posts, but it might just be that forgiveness, in its broadest definition, is the most powerful healing element. Love and forgiveness are one in the same, just as self-acceptance is not distinguishable from self-forgiveness.

It is my observation that most people have a deficiency of self-appreciation. I would guess that 99% of us don’t feel “good enough” deep down inside. Some of us are conscious of it and some of us are not.

In 2007, I designed and taught a class called The Beloved Self Seminar. I developed the course after recognizing that many self-development workshops, spirituality courses and prosperity classes were only as effective as the degree to which the participants truly valued themselves. I noticed that when participants of a personal growth class felt safe enough to share openly, they would reveal a struggle with self-worth, and that the sub text of the course would end up dealing with that theme. So it made sense to me to go there directly – to create an environment, a course, that would address those underlying issues that I saw surfacing every time in every seminar.

The concept behind the Beloved Self Seminar was that no matter where we are on the self-acceptance continuum, it is always of benefit to develop more love for ourselves. And that once we strengthen that connection with our inner self, we can then more easily make positive changes in our lives.

While there clearly was a need for The Beloved Self Seminar, the reality was that many people were too embarrassed to sign up for it. They were either too uncomfortable admitting that they were lacking in self-esteem, or that (ironically) they might be considered self-centered to take a class with that title. (FYI – the courageous people who did take the class, raved about it and seemed to truly benefit from it)

Now, 5 years later it’s clear that the Internet is the perfect venue for offering those same concepts and resources to the public. The premise of this project and website are the same as the original Beloved Self Seminar, and that is that self-appreciation and self-forgiveness are the most essential ingredients of the recipe for healing.

I am now following that recipe and plan to cook up some healing every day. I will blog about it as often as I can. Maybe daily, but at least a few times each week. And when I fall away from my practice, I will come back and write about that experience also.

If this path resonates with you I hope you will join me on this journey. It is my wish that you find something helpful, something comforting here. I invite you to participate by commenting on the posts that speak to you. I appreciate your support.